not lacking

wanting to live a life of abundance means having an attitude of such.

the daily nitty-gritties can reflect one's view of God and God's power in his life.

yes, I am cutting all sorts of expenses way more than before I made this decision a year ago. of coz with a comfy amount going into the bank account monthly without much of a sweat, just pure tiredness and exhaustion from the daily long commute plus catering to the incessant demands from on top, I was more slack in managing the finances, more liberal in the afternoon teh-si-siu-dais..the >$10 lunchs in malls.. just because I really love lunch breaks with the cols. sad to say tho that what often bonds us are also the non-stop complains and grouses, and the lack thereof simply means we are no longer 'one'. how wrong it is to find identify in the work that we do, bond over the work that we do.. and when everything is reduced to zero, we are back to our own role separately as a mother, daughter, wife... with different characters that may not even gel if not for the job that brought us tog. and how many of us can stay connected physically with the amount of stress that daily living demands from us all? and such is life. and i must admit that the hermit in me is enjoying a frugal lifestyle staying indoors most of the 1 yr duration.. but I am thankful for frens who still desperately try to ask me out for some fresh air and then picking up the tab thereafter. and so that was my 1 year of ... slack. not to mention the things that happened quite unexpectedly in between.. the many moments of regret purely out of fear and the 'sick and tired of it all' feeling trying to count every cent I've spent each day.

and oh, on abundance.. so much to learn from everyone ard.. precisely due to each of us being very different in our idiosyncrasies, it always serve as a good reminder not to even try to change anyone or convince anyone, rolling an eye or two might be the best way out but taking along with me the lessons learnt to not become so unbelieving because our God is a God of plenty. we will not die without network/fb/ig, or without battery not just because we have a power bank handy in our bag but because what doesn't kill us only make us stronger isn't it!? the tough and rugged life.. yet full of peace and freedom in Christ.. is what I seek.

so much so for the 'lack of' kinda feeling.. I want to be DONE with it.